Zahra Baker news round up: Chainsaw edition

Zahra Baker
Zahra Baker

There’s been a lot of news this week in the disappearance and death of Zahra Baker. I’m going to approach it article by article.

Delay for Zahra Baker’s stepmom on lower bail :

Zahra’s wicked stepmother, Elisa Baker, has had her request to have her bond lowered delayed. She’s currently sitting in jail on a $100K bond on obstruction charges for the fake ransom note.

The main reason I’m posting this story is for this picture…


Why in the pink hell would any sane man move himself and his daughter to the other side of the world for that?

The bond reduction hearing has been rescheduled for March.

Stepmother: Zahra Baker’s dad cut up her body:

This has been a big story of discussion this week. Basically, Elisa Baker has said that Zahra Baker dies on September 24th, 10 days before she was reported missing. However, a witness claims to have seen Zahra and the Sheen-cow on September 25th. Again, I believe very little that comes out of her cud-chewing mouth. In my amateur profiling opinion, it seems to me that Elisa Baker is a pathological liar who will say anything to save her own high skank content bacon.

For example, according to the search warrants that were released she claims that Adam Baker dismembered and dumped Zahra’s body however when investigators searched both their cell phone records, specifically their locations, it was Elisa Baker’s phone that was at those locations, not Adam’s. Granted that does not guarantee that Adam Baker didn’t have his wife’s cell phone with him but she strikes me as the type that isn’t flabby arm’s length from her cell phone texting all her trashy friends.

Relative: Disabled NC girl died of natural causes:

This story kind of flew under the radar for the most part but supposedly Elisa Baker told her aunt, one Boncetta “Buzzie” Winkler, that Zahra Baker died of natural causes.

“She’d been sick two weeks before she died,” Winkler said. “When they found her, I guess they didn’t know what to do. They just went wild.”

I have a couple of problems with this story. The first is Elisa Baker’s lying problem as I’ve mentioned several times before. The second is what does the griftopotamus consider ‘natural causes’? One might even assume that blunt force trauma could be considered natural causes to someone like Elisa Baker. If Zahra Baker was sick as Elisa Baker claims then why wasn’t she taken to a doctor or at least the ER? As we’ve seen on this site many times before kids are usually kept from medical professionals to keep the police from arresting the Breeders.

The last thing I want to address is the so-called ‘Chainsaw Massacre’ Role-Play game that Elisa and Adam Baker allegedly played.

That claim is nothing more than sensationalist journalism and I think should have no bearing on the actual investigation. The website they used is called It’s nothing more than a cross between Second Life and Yahoo Chat and cheap knockoffs of those websites as well. I don’t think this is the place where the plot to kill Zahra was hatched. It’s just a place where people with no real lives and from the look of the website bad taste hang out.

2 thoughts on “Zahra Baker news round up: Chainsaw edition”

  1. Being burlap bagged and drowned in the river by an angry mob would probably count as “natural causes” for Nastapotomus.


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