It’s Monday, and you know what that means. It’s time to recap all the shootings at high school football games from over the weekend. At least the ones we know of.

The lights are on, the bands are loud, and the bleachers are packed. High school football is back in full swing, which in today’s America doesn’t just mean touchdowns and marching bands. It also means the weekly spectacle of gunfire breaking up the action. If you can’t catch a college game on Saturday, don’t worry. Your local high school stadium is likely to offer a double feature of football and firearms.

Down in Lafayette, Alabama, the Lanett–Lafayette matchup didn’t make it to the second half. Referees said they heard shots and the sound of a car screeching across the street from the stadium. Witnesses confirmed a vehicle sped away. No word yet if anyone was hit, but the game ended right there. Talk about sudden death, am I right?

Meanwhile, in Baltimore, Forest Park was hosting Dunbar when the night ended with something louder than the band. Gunfire erupted off campus as the final whistle blew. A 19-year-old man was left bleeding with leg wounds while four masked suspects in a tan car made their exit. The principal was quick to assure parents no students were involved, but the message was clear. School spirit was drowned out by rapid fire. Attendance at future games is sure to be a real nail-biter.

Now, we head north to Youngstown, Ohio, where Cardinal Mooney High School’s student section got more than they bargained for at Stambaugh Stadium. One of their own went from limping off with what he thought was a twisted ankle to finding out he had actually been shot in the leg. He swore he wasn’t armed and wasn’t beefing with anyone. The school alert system at Youngstown State dutifully told people to avoid the stadium but reassured them everything was ‘under control.’ Because nothing says control quite like a teenager bleeding on the boulevard.

And in Connecticut, Griswold High School added its own chapter to the playbook. A 16-year-old, not even a student there, decided to bring a firearm to Friday night football. Police moved in quickly, made the arrest, and the superintendent insisted there was never any threat to the public. Translation: Nothing to see here, folks, except for the fact that a teenager strolled into the game with a gun.

So there you have it. Four states, four games, four different ways to turn Friday night lights into Friday night ‘mah rights.’ Forget the scoreboard; the new stat line is shots fired, suspects fleeing, and principals issuing letters to reassure rattled families. The real question isn’t who won on the field, but how many fans made it back to their cars without diving for cover.

High school football used to be about grit, glory, and community pride. Now it’s starting to look more like a live-action training exercise. Welcome to America’s fastest-growing spectator sport. Gunfire at the fifty-yard line.